Thursday, January 7, 2021

The threat of My Favourite

 Once upon a time I used to have some vestiges of a thing called personality, with associated aspects like likes/dislikes/interests/opinions.

So when I used to work previously at my current company, there was one person there who actually knew statistics and stuff and after attending a couple of meetings(4-hour long ones) and watching him shooting stupid ideas down, I marked that person as someone I would like to work with.

Seems that he might get involved in something I am doing right now, and if he does, it will probably be a nightmare. He is exacting and not always very polite, and these days I stay away from stress at all costs. Stress triggers very very weird pathways in my amygdala and life is hard enough as it is.

I emailed someone darya kinaray and seriously wish he'd take me up as his protegee. Seriously. The place should be awesome and the work would be much more interesting. Not that my current job doesn't seem full of promising potential to me-it does, at times- but I am very very wary of all my impressions now.

One question that has been bothering me is this: what does it mean to be emotional at any given moment? Does it mean a specific hormonal profile? Are feeling really only the hormonal currents in you, something that has always felt right to me?

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